Last summer I spent my holiday in Crete reading a massive biography of Neil Armstrong (strangely just before he died). It was a great read and one of the things that stuck out to me was the personality and faith of his mother Viola:
'After the Moon landing, viola summarized her beliefs: "My faith is deep and simple. I believe our body houses the soul within us-our body is a living temple of God, therefore it is sacred."
and
'The Bible was her rock. She respected the King James Version for "the way it is written." In 1929, her mothers wedding gift was The Red Letter New Testament, "with the Words of Jesus Christ printed in Red." Viola's underlining and margin notations reveal treasured passages, among them Psalm 37 - "Trust in the Lord, and do good" and "the meek shall inherit the earth."
But then weirdly at the end of the book it said this:
On Monday, May 21, 1990, back in Ohio, she died suddenly. A few days earlier, she surprised her daugther by saying, "I am not sure there really is a God. But I am very happy that I believed."
What on earth are you to make of someone saying that after a lifetime of faithfulness? Was it mental illness setting in? Was her faith really always like this and now she finally just wanted to admit it?
It just struck me that they're not really the kind of last words I would want.
Near the end of his life Paul in 2 Tim 4v7-8 said:I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. 8 Henceforth there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but also to all who have loved his appearing.
Some of these words were inscribed on C H Spurgeon's coffin. Iain Murray interestingly says that:
The opinion became current that Spurgeon had used Paul's verse as his own last words, but his 'armour-bearer', J. W. Harrald, who was with him to the end, denied it: 'He did not utter them: it would have been contrary to the whole spirit of his life for him to have done so; he had far too humble an opinion of his own work, and worth to use the inspired language.'
I don't know if I will even get a chance to have some final words, but whatever the circumstances of my finishing the race I want it to be well.
